What I Love… The Idea of Soulmates

I believe that we gravitate to like minded people or souls and that those people are messengers that challenge us, make us question our way of being and our beliefs in a way that we have no choice but to grow, transform, evolve. Although, I have previously struggled with the idea of soulmates, until recently. I thought of soulmates as being synonymous with “the one”, “the one” person we are supposed to marry and spend the rest of our lives with. How is it possible that there could only be “one” person out there for us when there are so many people in the world that we will never even meet? What if our one soulmate lived in another country and we never had the chance to meet. I always thought that would be tragic.  Although, I suppose the theory is that soulmates are meant to meet. My cousin challenged me recently by saying that it’s possible to have more than one soulmate in our lives. This opened up this whole new world of possibilities. I know I’ve had many soulmates in my life that got me to this moment here now.

Lately, I have been thinking about all my past relationships with friends, family, and ex-boyfriends. What kept me coming back to the idea of a soulmates was knowing I had grown in such a way that my life has changed forever because of the lessons I learned from those relationships. While I’m still me, I have changed, or should I say grown, in ways that it’s hard for me to even recognize myself from who I was six months ago after my last breakup. How could he not have been a soulmate?  I know I wanted to deny it for awhile, but the truth is any relationship I have in the future will be changed forever, from friends to family to lovers. There was a lot that I needed to learn, I hate to say that I was naive when it came to relationships, maybe even a little selfish, but I’m beginning to realize what’s important in a relationship for me and what’s not.

Thinking about this made me think of all the significant people in my life  that have challenged me, forced me to evolve, to open my eyes to new ways of living, being, existing. These really do encompass a broad range of people that are still in my life or once were in my life, my parents, my friends, my lovers. If we really do have many soulmates in our lives then it must also mean that some come and go quickly, while others stay in our lives year after year.

To all of those soulmates who have been there to help me grow, to all of those who have been on my journey with me, to all of those who have challenged me and forced me to grow, and to all of those that made me see my blind spots so that I could grow, thank you. To all of you in my life, thank you. I hope that I have helped you as much as you have helped me.


2 Comments to “What I Love… The Idea of Soulmates”

  1. Good post, as usual.

    I find it very interesting how our brains tend to snap into these “all or nothing” mentalities when it comes to relationships. It’s no surprise, seeing as it is such an emotional thing.

    I like to think I am a fairly reasonable person, basing my views on evidence, etc, and according the strength of my belief in things to what the evidence suggests. HOWEVER, the two things I have the most certain about in my life have turned out to be dead wrong. First, I KNEW KNEW KNEW for a fact, 100% that I would marry my college GF. Two months after I graduated, we broke up. Several years later, I met another girl who I hit it off with more than anyone EVER. And even though I met her in VT, and was moving to OR, somehow I allowed myself to think it would work. I was just as certain with this girl as I was with my college gf. It didn’t.

    Anyway, point being, it’s so odd how we can be so certain about who our “soul mate” is, and how blinded to it we can be by emotion.

    • We should be with someone we can see ourselves with forever, but I also believe when we fall out of love it is important to let the other person go, it’s only fair. Sometimes we have a hard time seeing that. So there really isn’t one person out there for us, there are many, and sometimes the one only means that they are the right one for right now, but not necessarily the one for the future. Maybe I just haven’t met the right one, but I can’t say that my past relationships have not been significant because they were to me, even though they were meant to end.

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